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Parry Hotter - A Flashback

Blogged on 06-Oct-05 03:47:48 pm in DrainBrain -- Viewed by : Fans

In the short break during a practice session, Parry Hotter starts looking for a good lamppost to ease himself. He had figgered that it wouldn't be a prudent thing to take a leak while flying on a broom above a gawking crowd looking at his antics chasing shining balls in the sky.

The Broom was a new gift from GrrrVin, the canine wizard magician, who had been once the blind-dog for Melvin, the human wizard. As Parry lifted his leg against the school gates. his mind went back to his younger days when Grrvin and he played in the same Hard Bark band - Bones and Marrows. What a crowd that was. Parry himself played the Lead, Grrvin the Drums, Lick "Cool" Jagga the Sax and Cozy Whosebone the Bass. You should hear the Woofers reverberate with some of the power chords they played. How could he forget Jimmy 'Bow-wow' Growlison who played some amazing stuff on the keys? And the babes who came to listen to them play. Hey, were they popular dogs among the bitches?

The opening act every night was performed by a Labrador called Michael Barkson, a cool musician, who screwed his life trying to look like a Pomeranian through cosmetic surgery. The surgery affected him so much that he had to tape his muzzle to his face with plasticol. People also wondered about his accquaintances, cos the rest of the band were just Puppies. He walked freaky with forelegs across the stage that drove the audience crazy.

Bones and Marrows had a cool contract with YecchMV. Grrvin had some good contacts in the company thru his granddaddy, who appears on the YecchMV label. His name was Fredrick Forstooth and he authored the Book -"Wars of Dogs" which was a million copies bestseller. He was also a great jazz artist. The pic you see on the label was actually the last one of FF; he was shot dead by his master right after the photo was taken. The next snap was never made public. In it, you can see FF tearing the LP to bits after having to endure listening to His Master’s Voice singing some crap Rap number, throughout the photography session for the Record company. The last thing FF heard was HMV say "Shit, shoot that damn dog".

Though the band was a five-some, there were lots of pals who were around. On weekdays, they hung around the streets with the babes. Parry fondly remembered Foxonna, one of his best bitches, herself a renowned musician. How he ran behind her. Well he never himself considered a leader, he was more content as a follower. Even as he thought of her after all these years, his nose tingled with pleasure. She wore a shiny black leather collar and wow she had a supple figure. A slick Dalmatian. You probably saw her sister in that movie, 100 Dalmatians. There were times that the entire pack would follow her across blocks.

Not that he was the best sniffer around; There was Kill Clindog. It was rumored that he sniffed around in high places, even among the bitches in the White Kennel. Bill made lots of money setting up a supply chain and catering to the Tennis Clubs. He sold them Catguts from the leftovers after the gang mauled the cats that transgressed into his street. Nosey Parker, the Alsatian, who went on to become a detective dog later in life was considered the expert sniffer. His experience in his younger days got him fame, when recently he managed to catch a notorious criminal who was trying to smuggle heroin shoved up his arse.

There were a few other gangs that roamed the streets those days. The Flatbarkians were one weird lot, not many understood what they barked, but they were easily one of the coolest in town. There was another bunch led by a crazy dog called Great Whacko Boxer, whose only job was to meddle into the affairs of other gangs. He was indifferent to the needs of his own gang members and took long vacations, when the pressure built up during the dog days.

There was also NetSet gang, who were actually more interested in emails than the females. They were a breed apart.

After a couple of years, the rat race caught up with them and they parted their own ways. Grrvin went on to become a corporate bigwig selling an internet bowser named FireDox, which helped the canine community get into closed bakeries without having to go through Windows. Jagga started his own booze plant and his brand, "Terriers" is world famous today . Cozy was the one who changed the most. From a hard-striking bassist, he became a popular televangelist and makes million dollars preaching - "thou Shalt not sniff thy neighbors bitch”. Bow-wow joined the FBI and has spent the past 5 years in vain helping the Americans trying to find someone called Bin Laden.

As he lowered his legs and heard the whistle for the practice session, Parry let out a long sigh. He didn't want the broom between his legs. He never wanted to be a magician, just wanted to be a Lead guitar player.

Shit man, he thought, Mark Knoffler makes more money in a year than David Copperfield would make in his lifetime.


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